We feel the Truth inside us.

The above picture is of me holding my progress so far on stitching all of the indigo dyed pieces of fabric I have together.

I have been stitching these pieces together as I listen to The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings on audio. It's honestly my favorite thing to do lately. I feel in my body like I am entering into a portal when I do this. It feels soft and honest. Like I'm not lying. I wonder if you know what I mean dear reader. Do you? 

I heard Liz Gilbert say that once. She said that the only time she feels "true" is when she's writing. 

I love the simple act of hand stitching. It doesn't get boring to me. It's peaceful. But I do also recognize that I don't think this project would feel meaningful to me if I didn't have plans to paint a portrait on it. That is what makes this worth doing to me. I have in my mind's eye, a show of several paintings. They are a series of portrait paintings painted with black walnut ink on these stitched canvases. 

This feels like slow work. And it is. And I wonder if that is perfect for me right now. To just be slow and ease my way in through my portal again. with humility. It has taken me a while to find this again, and I don't know what will come of it. But there is something about this project that feels really promising and hopeful. I think it is amazing how when we learn to tune into these subtle cues our bodies give us we really can trust them. We know when we are lying and we know when others are lying to us. Our body tells us this. And we know when we have landed on the truth and we know when we are being told the truth. Our body is always trustworthy. I find that fascinating. It's our best antidote to gaslighting. 

I feel like even though I don't have a studio right now, and I don't have a huge audience for my art, and I don't have a lot of new work and I don't have any shows lined up, this is something. This is something hopeful. This little spark. This little opening. This tiny touchpoint. It's something. It's a place to start again. 

Quiet. Still. Soft. 

and True.