Piecing together a creative life

     Sometimes life seems crazy. I've been attempting to live more out in nature this past year, so I moved into a studio out in the countryside near Penland School of Crafts. First I was living in my SUV and just renting the studio and then I moved into a house and out of the studio. Now I just have the house. It's been a learning curve. 

This past summer, I noticed that almost all my things had mildew growing on them. At first this was just annoying and then it became a major problem. I started sleeping in my car again when I noticed that I was experiencing these weird symptoms that I think are related to the mold. I got a dehumidifier and now that's it's winter, I've been using my wood stove, which is supposed to help. I was also told to wipe everything off with vinegar. I noticed it on some of my books, so the other day I spent the entire day wiping off every book I own with vinegar, soap and water. I don't really want to move out of my house, so I'm doing what I can for the time being and making the best of it. 

Also, I bought this big table, which started sagging in the middle. I put the removable stand back in the middle and now the outer legs are hovering in mid air. So the newly cleaned off books have now become a weight for the warped table. 

Life is a process. 

I have been hand stitching all these pieces of indigo dyed fabric together and listening to the Hobbit on audio. 

Some might think that this is tedious, but I find it really soothing. The light green pieces I dyed with fresh indigo that I grew in my dye garden. (I made a film about this on my vlog if you're interested).

The darker, blue pieces were dyed in my indigo vat that I made after taking a natural dying and weaving class with Catherine Ellis and Joy Boutrup this past summer at Penland School of Crafts. 

The plan is to stitch all these pieces together and create a "canvas" to work on and then paint a portrait on it. Portraits are my favorite thing. I don't know who I will paint, so I've been thinking about just starting with myself again. 

I created a series of self-portraits when I was at the Burren College of Art in 2015-2016. I used black berry juice/ink then because that was what was available in the landscape. Since I returned to the States, I've mostly been using black walnut ink because black walnuts are everywhere in this southern Appalachian landscape and it is the perfect ink to use. As a result, a lot of my paintings are brown. I've been wanting to incorporate more color into my artwork, so that is largely the reason I wanted to take that class. During the class, we used cochineal, weld, and cutch extract to make ink/paint that worked in a similar way as the black walnut ink works. So in the future, I would like to paint a series of portraits incorporating those colors as well, but for now, I think I am going to stick with the black walnut. I like using black walnut ink because it comes from the landscape I live in and because I foraged the black walnuts myself and made the ink myself. I think there is something really special about incorporating the actual landscape into my artwork. It's different than a dye garden and it's definitely different than going to an art store. It's getting to know the landscape and building a relationship with her. I have a lot to say about that, which I think I will not say right now in this post. 

One last thing I will say though is just this: Somehow, I would like to start writing more about my spiritual life and also the things I feel more awake to than I ever have before. Little by little, I feel the layers of lies being peeled away from my life and mind and I see more clearly than ever before. It's still a process of course, but I am finding myself wanting to write about this or express it somehow. Obviously, blogging is one way to do this. Videos feel more vulnerable, but they are also a way. There's a lot to say. I'm just going to give it a go and see what happens. Stay tuned if you're interested and you're welcome to comment. My heart is in my art and in this healing revolution that I believe is happening right now on planet earth. We are moving towards uncovering the lies that have kept us captive for so long. I'll leave it at that for now. I love you! Be well and keep asking yourself, "Is that true?" But only if it's a belief that's creating suffering for you in some way. 

Peace,

Suzanne.